Krypt3ia

(Greek: κρυπτεία / krupteía, from κρυπτός / kruptós, “hidden, secret things”)

SONY HACK: Winners and Losers

with 7 comments

Sony-Hack

What a difference a few hours off Twitter can make… Since last night the US government has made it known that they feel they have enough “evidence” to say that DPRK and Kim Jong Un were behind the hack on Sony. So far, all that I have seen personally posted online and in the news that counts as “evidence” has been inferential and certainly not worth spit in a court of law, never mind even in a mock court taking place in a 5th grade classroom!

Instead we have Sony playing the “poor us” card, the IR service (Mandiant) saying nothing, and the internet and social media on fire with comments on how this is either just utter buffoonery at a nation state level or hue and cries for response against DPRK for this “Act of WAR!”

*hangs head*

ERMEGERD we are doomed aren’t we….

So I came up with this little list of the winners and losers for you all.

Winners:

  • Whoever hacked Sony (Interview not being shown and fear being sown)
  • Sony (Poor SONY it was advanced! We’re bleeding money! POTUS SAVE US!)
  • Armchair CYBER WAR experts (Holy fuck Dave Aitel selling CYBER WARRRRRR)
  • CYBER CHICKEN HAWKS (HOLY FUCK! DAVE AITEL SELLING CYBER WARRRRR!)
  • Anyone with an agenda against DPRK
  • Anyone looking to sell attribution services (Mandiant/FireEye/Crowdstrike)
  • APT Appliance manufacturers (Mandiant/FireEye/Crowdstrike)
  • Kevin Mandia (Apologist email of the CENTURY)
  • GOP (Whoever you are.. Well played)
  • Every person, entity, or group from here on who decides to do the same thing in similar ways (keep an eye on this one)
  • Fucksticks like Dave Aitel (ERMEGERD)
  • THE LAWYERS! GIGGITY MO MONEY MO MONEY MO MONEY!

Losers:

  • All of us who are sane (It’s knee jerk time people, put on your helmets)
  • Sanity (what little we had as a nation and a people post 9/11 and the torture reports)
  • Any of us who have a clue about hacking and the world of network security (I am sure we will all be drinking soon at Shmoo)
  • Our national reputation (Once again, post Torture report there wasn’t much left but now.. oy)
  • Serious discussion of actual network and information warfare (RidT/Robert M Lee etc) (poor bastards)
  • Freedom of expression due to fear of reprisals due to veiled threats of 9/11 *1000 attacks (Just mention 9/11 and shit happens!)
  • Insurance companies that offer cyber insurance (I sincerely hope you guys fight this one with Sony)
  • The concept of “sophistication” in hacking of targets (We already had a problem here.. Now it’s been completely abdicated as a notion seriously)

So yeah, the nation is now at CYBER WAR with DPRK over some company that pays a lot in lobbyist bribes… I mean fee’s… No.. Bribes… To the government because they have an agenda. (MPAA/SOPA/PIPA etc) A company that totally abdicated it’s responsibilities concerning the security of it’s data and that of everyone it works with mind you. That part of the story seems to be lost in all the sabre rattling of late though.

PAY NO ATTENTION TO THE NAKED MAN BEHIND THE CURTAIN!

Good god… This is a pile of fecal vomitus.

K.

Written by Krypt3ia

2014/12/18 at 11:18

Posted in SONY

7 Responses

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  1. North Korea get to look good (whether or not they had anything to do with it). Hell, they’ve just got the US government to ‘admit’ that NK has got away with CYBERWAR! (Even if it’s nothing of the sort)
    Either way it makes them look relevant and competent.

    I’m kinda hoping that GOP got a copy of The Interview and they stick it up online at some point in a week or so, just to show how badly everyone got trolled.

    phuzz

    2014/12/19 at 15:01

  2. I have never for one minute thought that NK would do this or honestly have the capacity to make it happen, at least without China’s help.

    Laslo

    2014/12/22 at 20:54

  3. Chill fellas, no need to up it anywhere. Sony will release it after the publicity stunt and we’ll all be happy. Even DPKR! Can u imagine that?
    By the way, don’t up it. Sony may come after you claiming copyright… you know… may need some dough for the lawyers!
    Peace

    Elmo Renito

    2014/12/23 at 05:32

  4. Excellent analysis!!! Is the graphic ‘creative commons’ – permission to use?

    Michael Collins

    2014/12/25 at 22:38

  5. Found online. Google search it.

    Krypt3ia

    2014/12/26 at 01:13


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