Krypt3ia

(Greek: κρυπτεία / krupteía, from κρυπτός / kruptós, “hidden, secret things”)

Inconceivable!

with 2 comments

So, I was looking through Monster for some candidates in my search for a sysadmin. This resume “stood out”… Good lord! What are we teaching these people? Are we at all?

CONTACT INFO
Michael XXXX
XXXXXXXXXX
XXXXXXXXXX
XXXX

Contact Preference: Telephone

Email:XXXXXXXXXXX

RESUME
Resume ID: XXXXXXXX
Resume Headline: The Gaming/Computer Expert

OBJECTIVE:
I goal is to further my education and gain experiance in the a IT field, i also wish to
gain a foothold in the game testing field! I love video games and have the will and want to test them for any company!

EXPERIENCE:
5/2006 – Present
XXXX
Hartford, CT

Industry: Construction – Residential & Commercial/Office Computer Technician

I am a techicain who does house calls to repair all computer problems and
upgrades needed.

5/2006 – 8/2007
Staples
Industry: Computer Hardware
Office Equipment Specailist/XXXXX
XXXXXXXX, CT
I was the department manager for 6 months then i chose to go more tword my field as a easy tech which my job duties were to fix computers and manage the tech center

3/2006 – 5/2006
XXXXX
Industry: Management Consulting Services manager
hartford, ct
i run the network,build custom computers,fix computers, and help with making chioces in operation.

4/2004 – 10/2005
XXXX
Industry: Computer/IT Services Manager XXXXXXXX, NY
I was the main manager at this internet cafe, i had to not only do payroll but hire
and do loss provention as well. I had to do computer repairs as well as upgrades.

EDUCATION:
11/2006
New Horizens
XXXX
Certification
I am have completed my class on my A+ certification and i am working on my network Certification.

5/2005
XXXX
High School or equivalent
XXXX

1 of 2 10/29/2007 11:40 AM

I am Very Skilled in computer skills including network admin. and fixing problems with them. I learn very quickly and am planning to go to collage for a masters degree

SKILLS:
Skill Name
Skill Level
Last Used/Experience
Fixing computers
Expert
Currently used/4 years
Network Admin.
Expert
Currently used/4 years
manager
Expert
Currently used/1 years
Network Security
Expert
Currently used/4 years
Customer Service
Expert
Currently used/3 years
Video game testing
Expert
Currently used/14 years

LANGUAGES:
Languages
Proficiency Level

English
Fluent – Full Knowledge

REFERENCES:
Reference Name:
Bruce Bent
Reference Company:
Staples
Reference Title:
Store Manager
Phone:
XXX
Type:
Professional

Reference Name:
XXXXX
Reference Company:
Staples
Reference Title:
Department Manager
Phone:
XXXX
Type:
Professional

ADDITIONAL
I am very skilled in all operating systems and can fix all problems with networks. i

INFORMATION:
am also good at keeping networks safe from hackers and ECT. I can also build and fix computers along with being a fast learner i am attending New Horizens in windsor CT. I would like my employer to help me further my education if possible.

I have completed my class for A+ certification and my network plus as well as my network admin. In my last job i have got the Associate of the month as well as countless customer compliment letters sent to the president of staples. I have been
playing video games since i was 6. i am great at it and i love to do it. I always put
100% into any work i do.

SUMMARY
Current Career Level:
Manager (Manager/Supervisor of Staff)

Years of relevant work 2+ to 5 Years
experience:
Work Status:
US -I am authorized to work in this country for any employer.

Written by Krypt3ia

2007/10/29 at 11:55

Posted in Uncategorized

2 Responses

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  1. if this gentleman puts 100% effort into everything he does and THIS is his resume (best foot forward and all that), then RUN… for he is indeed correct when he says “upgrades needed.”

    junquegrrl

    2007/10/29 at 13:38

  2. Hahaha we all had a good laugh over this one. However, it is quite scary the amount of resumes out there with errors not only in spelling, but also grammar.

    Scary…

    But then again, how many students still think we fought WWII with Germany against Russia?

    Oh yeah….

    crabbyolbastard

    2007/10/29 at 14:06


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